Recently, I've found myself caught between trusting and believing.
I know. That sounds like the same thing. But I'll explain. I find myself caught between "simply trusting God" and "believing God for specific things."
Does that make more sense?
I've been thinking about this quandary in my mind as my "Presbyterian roots" vs my "charismatic church upbringing." I realize that's a narrow stereotype or something not-too-correct, so just have grace with me.
Simply trusting God: This is the time where I say, I know God can work miracles and do above and beyond what I can think or imagine. He works all things together for His glory. Let's pray and ask the Lord to work and trust Him in however He chooses to work.
Believing God for specific things: This is where I "pray, believing" God for a certain outcome to a situation. I find verses and stretch my faith muscles and don't doubt or wonder, because "he that doubts doesn't receive anything from the Lord."
But I find myself getting legalistic with the "believing" option. It becomes performance based for me. If I do everything right, I get what I prayed for. If I don't get what I prayed for, I must not have believed enough or prayed the right things. Or maybe that one evening when I doubted if it was going to happen, that messed everything up.
Pastor Jay shared this in his weekly church email: When we believe, deep down, that God's blessing depends on how well we're behaving, we wither and groan under the heavy burden of self-reliance.
I'm thankful I have a husband who reminds me that the truth is probably somewhere in the middle of the two extremes I've created.
And thankful for God, who always shows us the truth. I think I'll curl up with a cup of tea and my Bible and talk to Him. :)